Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Money is dirty

Seriously people, money is filthy. I don't mean in a hippie dippie socialist let's go back to bartering way. I mean money carries a lot of germs. Why is that you might ask? Basically because toddlers and other gross people handle it. Let me explain. Our house should be under quarantine right now because the little dude and I have a bad stomach virus. Apparently it is very contagious because lots of people we know have had it. How bad could it be you ask? Every time the poor little dude passed gas yesterday we had to change his underwear. So he was wearing just his underwear and a t-shirt for most of the day. At one point he walks through the room and quarters start falling out of his undies. They were coming out of the leg hole every time he took a step. It was like we won the jackpot at a toddler casino. He had been going through his easter basket and found the quarters in some of the plastic eggs. He explained that he put them in his "pocket"(the flap on the front of his undies). So these quarters were jingling around in what is probably the most germ contaminated spot in our house. Where are those quarters now? Who knows. They are probably in a piggy bank, waiting to release their evil stomach bug germs on the next unsuspecting victim. It reminds me of when I used to work in retail and people would use the waistband of their spandex bike shorts or their bra as a wallet. It is pretty gross being handed cash soaking wet with sweat. Remember when you were a child and your classmates carried their lunch money in their shoes? Bottom line, money is dirty, so wash your hands thoroughly with soap and water after you handle cash. Don't try to blame it on my toddler either.

 Don't forget to wash those hands,

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