Saturday, April 27, 2013

How my son plays house.

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Mommy Tractor with her little baby lawn mower(?) and baby dump truck.
steam roller: Oh Mommy you are so big and yellow.
Mommy Tractor: Little lawn mower, you are sooo cute. I love you. And I love you my little baby dump truck.
dump truck: Mommy you have big wheels and you have four wheels.
Mommy Tractor: Get into my big hand baby dump truck. Get in too sister lawn mower. I can pick you up with my big hand and hug you.
dump truck: Aww Mommy, you put us in your big hand and take us for a walk?
Mommy Tractor: Yes baby we will go outside.

This conversation was voiced entirely by my three year old son while I was putting up laundry in his room. I just had to share this.

Take care,
 Mrs. PJ

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Sunday, April 21, 2013

Milestones

1. Starting with the youngest, our  eight month old baby girl is crawling with her belly off of the floor. She is also pulling up and walking along while holding to furniture. Yesterday she pulled herself up to standing using my leg and then she let go and was standing on her own! So exciting.
2. Our son has been voluntarily brushing his teeth and sitting on the real toilet to poop. I mean without us prompting or nagging, he is getting excited about personal hygiene. This might have something to do with the fact that he has figured out how to make "snakes" with his toothpaste and likes flushing toilet paper. Hey, it doesn't matter what his motivation is, he is doing it. So proud.

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That was a new roll five minutes ago.
3. The school district I work for has hired me to work on two curriculum projects. I feel honored that I was selected, plus it will help me recoup some of the money I lost when I took a three month maternity leave. Then on Friday my Assistant Principle and the Lead Principle gave me high praise for a study guide I created. So nerdy, I know.
4. Mr. PJ is making mad progress on the car he is rebuilding in the garage. A few weeks ago it just looked like an empty frame with a couple hundred parts laying around. Now it is starting to look like it might run again one day. So impressive.

Take care,
Mrs.PJ


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Saturday, April 13, 2013

You know you share your bathroom with a toddler when ..........

... you get the play by play on the laundry, "The dirty laundry was this big and now it is this big." He tells me this with his hands clearly exaggerating how tall our laundry pile is.
... every beauty and hygiene product you leave out on the counter gets stacked into a carefully balanced "mountain".
...no matter how hard you scrub the toilet, how long you burn a candle or how much disinfectant you spray, it always smells like someone just peed on the floor.
... the toilet paper roll (that you just replaced) looks like someone unwound the entire roll and then carelessly rolled it back on, creating a giant toilet paper wad that barely turns, because someone did.
... you emerge from a nice warm relaxing shower to be greeted with the double whammy of a tiny ice cold hand slapping you on the bum and then jabbing you in the bely button.

I might need to start locking the door,
Mrs. PJ


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Thursday, April 11, 2013

Show and Tell

How to change a wriggly toddler:
1. Lay toddler on floor and sit at a 90 degree angle facing him or her.
2. Use your leg to pin toddlers upper body and arms. There has to be some kind of wrestling term for this maneuver, I just don't know what it is. If you don't want to pin their arms you can hand them a toy or a book and hope they don't throw it back at you. Then pin their body.
3. Fold your other leg under you, sing a song to distract them and quickly change the offending diaper.
4. Release your toddler.
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Don't let that tiny baby head confuse you, the toddler is behind the Dr. Suess book.
The demonstration photo above looks a little confusing, but this technique really works, trust me.  I witnessed a good friend of mine changing her little man this way and asked if I could share it with you.   Our tot is in undies most of the time now, but I will definitely be using this when little miss PJ gets big enough to fight back. 

How to break in a new glove:
1. Buy your new softball or baseball glove and make sure the person using it can fit their hand into it before you bring it home. 
2. Slather that crisp glove with vitamin E oil. Yes, the same vitamin E oil you used on your post pregnancy stretch marks. 
3. Now coat that thing with lanolin, rubbing it into every crook, seam and cranny. Yes, the same lanolin you use on breast feeding nipples. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about. This stuff is good for your glove. 
4. Put the ball you will be using in the pocket of the glove and wrap that thing like a christmas present. Wrap a hand towel or handkerchief around the ball and glove, tie with twine, and then toss the whole ensemble into a pillow case and tie that off. 
5. Throw that thing into the dryer with a load of wet laundry. The heat will work the oil and lanolin into the leather, the tumbling action will beat the stiffness out, and the humidity from the laundry will prevent your glove from getting to dry. The pillow case and towel layers around the glove protect your glove. You will see a noticeable difference in the play of your glove, but you can repeat steps 2-5 as needed.

How to wear your baby:
copywrite Mrs.PJ 2013- FOREVER
I wish I could carry her to work like this.
1. Find a baby wearing support group like Bay Area Baby Wearers.
2. Check out the great guides at Becoming Mommas or Sleeping Baby Productions.
3. Enjoy snuggling with your baby and having your hands free!

Remember I share because I care. Nobody is paying me to, FYI
Take care,
Mrs. PJ


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Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Money is dirty

Seriously people, money is filthy. I don't mean in a hippie dippie socialist let's go back to bartering way. I mean money carries a lot of germs. Why is that you might ask? Basically because toddlers and other gross people handle it. Let me explain. Our house should be under quarantine right now because the little dude and I have a bad stomach virus. Apparently it is very contagious because lots of people we know have had it. How bad could it be you ask? Every time the poor little dude passed gas yesterday we had to change his underwear. So he was wearing just his underwear and a t-shirt for most of the day. At one point he walks through the room and quarters start falling out of his undies. They were coming out of the leg hole every time he took a step. It was like we won the jackpot at a toddler casino. He had been going through his easter basket and found the quarters in some of the plastic eggs. He explained that he put them in his "pocket"(the flap on the front of his undies). So these quarters were jingling around in what is probably the most germ contaminated spot in our house. Where are those quarters now? Who knows. They are probably in a piggy bank, waiting to release their evil stomach bug germs on the next unsuspecting victim. It reminds me of when I used to work in retail and people would use the waistband of their spandex bike shorts or their bra as a wallet. It is pretty gross being handed cash soaking wet with sweat. Remember when you were a child and your classmates carried their lunch money in their shoes? Bottom line, money is dirty, so wash your hands thoroughly with soap and water after you handle cash. Don't try to blame it on my toddler either.

 Don't forget to wash those hands,
Mrs.PJ

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Thursday, April 4, 2013

I should really write some of this stuff down....

Well, at least that is what people keep telling me. I know it is true because time flies when you are having fun and they just grow up so fast. You know you have a toddler in the house....

- When you buy the largest bottle of ketchup the grocery store sells. Did you know there is a 64 ounce squeeze bottle?

- When you think you hear a parrot and then realize it is your child. Toddlers like to mimic. Lately he has been telling me, "Mommy you're just so cute." He even pets my hair and kisses me on the cheek.

- When you triple check the toilet seat before sitting down. At least there have been no potty accidents at school (daycare) this week so far. That is worth celebrating.

- When you spend the whole weekend cleaning house but by breakfast time Monday morning there are no clean place mats.

- When your favorite nursery rhymes get the toddler touch re-mix,
   " Ba ba black sheep, you're an animal" and " Old McDonald had a farm E-I-E-I-O.  On that farm he had a dog whose name was B-I-N-G-O."

Love them while they are little because it goes by fast.
Take care,
Mrs. PJ


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